The Role and Effects of Social Media in the Modern Dating World

Social media have become a major way to meet others, giving rise to new dating terms, letting people in different regions connect, making it easier to initiate contact, etc., they have many negative effects, too.

Before social media, you could only meet someone at work, through friends or family, at school, or by chance. The likelihood of getting together with someone from another city, state, or country was minimal unless you traveled often. All of this has changed, with social media demolishing geographical barriers and simplifying the process of finding and initiating contact. They have also introduced new dating norms, from the best time to reply to a message to “announcing” a relationship status online.

New online dating terminology

The use of social media in dating has given rise to concepts such as breadcrumbing, orbiting, and cuffing. Breadcrumbing is when someone consistently checks in with you and suggests you could go on a date. This sustains your interest, but the person never follows through. They do this to keep their options open.

Someone makes it clear they don’t want a relationship or has cut off communication with you, but they keep viewing or reacting to your posts on social media. Some people might perceive this as lingering interest, but that’s usually not the case. It’s called “orbiting.”

Another common term is “cuffing,” or being tied down to someone, usually during winter (also known as cuffing season).

The positive impact of social media on dating

Social media’s ability to connect people with different backgrounds is a significant advantage. The expanded dating pool has changed the game for many people, especially those with more limited dating options, due to physical isolation and other factors.

Different platforms cater to various interests and hobbies, allowing people to connect with like-minded potential partners.

Social media have made initiating connections easier. All you do is send a message or react to a post. Even shy people can make the first move. Sharing a meme or commenting on a post can serve as a conversation starter.

Social media are a virtual barrier, which provides a sense of control and safety. It lets people communicate freely and authentically. Social media facilitates daily communication, which is critical for keeping a connection alive. They make it possible to maintain long-distance relationships, which have become very common with the advent of globalization. They let couples share experiences and stay close despite the physical distance between them.

The negative impacts

Social media have become omnipresent, and the distractions they often lead to can put a strain on any relationship. An increasingly common phenomenon is “phubbing” or “phone snubbing,” where one person ignores their partner because they’re on their phone. Around 51% of Americans who have partners say their significant other is sometimes or frequently distracted by their smartphone when they talk. Just over a third of partnered adults admit they looked through their partner’s smartphone without them knowing, and 40% expressed frustration at how much time their partner spends on their smartphone.

Social media can fuel insecurity and jealousy in relationships, and disagreements may arise. 27% of social media users feel unsure or jealous due to their partner’s use of social media, and 7% say they experience this frequently. Apparently, even seeing a partner comment or like someone else’s posts can lead to jealousy. Thankfully, just 32% of social media users experience insecurity or jealousy in their relationships due to social media.

Relationships are idealized on social media, causing people to unfavorably compare theirs to what they see online. Users draw attention to the best aspects of their relationships, creating unrealistic expectations. This can lead to dissatisfaction with one’s relationship.

There’s a risk of overreliance on social media interactions, and people have fewer deep, in-person conversations. What’s more, overreliance on social media for validation causes relationships to suffer.

Recap